This is the day when I back myself
when I give back to myself
when I bestow the compassion that I have been
seeking from others
on my own wanting flesh and aching bones.
Today I take down my high fences and
replace them with boundaries and I
survey the terrain of this heart of mine
and see that it is good.
The day I fit my own mask before I fit
the mask of others around me.
the day I draw a line in the sand and say
this is who I am, and I am
wild and fierce but I am
This is the day that I will go out on a limb and
expect the universe to meet me half way,
acknowledging that what I put out is exactly what I get in return
and that if the devil turned up on my doorstep
it is because I summoned him there,
and that yes my addiction to self deprecation and atonement are
often the same thing
and that yes I may have followed him into
hell and done deals unholy,
but I walked back out again with my
head held high
and that carries both weight
This is the day that I will pledge to write my way through
but not at the expense of my sanity and
whilst I will not contribute to the noise I will make a promise
to speak my truth, mindfully.
Today I bow before synchronicity and simplicity.
small moves and simpler words.
I surrender to possibility.
with the knowledge that our memories do not make us.
and that sometimes we cannot reconcile with the choices we’ve made,
but still I tear the pages out of my book, that are black and
heavy with ink and tearstains
and I offer unto myself my own redemption,
I cannot save the devil,
but I can save
This is the day I raise a glass to all that has gone before
as I take my rightful place in a new world
and while the road may be long and fraught with danger,
every step I take is a choice.
I have a choice
and I am stronger than I give myself credit for.
I am alive
and my time starts